Residents Excited for New Business, As Long As It's Not Literally Any of the Ones That Ever Open
GROVE CITY, OH — Residents erupted in cautious enthusiasm Tuesday after news broke that a new business may be coming to town — with the important caveat that it must not be a bank, coffee chain, steakhouse, Mexican restaurant, fried chicken joint, nail salon, vape shop, data center, or anything else that has ever previously existed. “We’re open to fresh ideas,” said longtime resident Debbie R, “But we don’t want another typical place. Give us something new, unique, and community-focused — you know, like the place that closed last year because no one went.” ...